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Written by Jay on December 25th, 2011.
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It’s the end of the year, and what a year it was. I can’t believe how fast it’s gone etc etc, and we just wanted to do a little wrap up of how it was for us, a few highlights, and mostly just to say thanks to all of you that bought some stuff off us, talked rubbish with us on facebook or done some tweets and stuff on twitters. You guys are cool, and without you we’d all probably just be digging holes somewhere (which wouldn’t be all that bad given the tan we’d get and the lunch bars we’d get to eat at).
When we were talking about what happened this year, the first thing that came to mind was the Christchurch Earthquake. While it’s never nice to see such tragedy and loss, I think the lasting memory will be the way NZ came together and the sense of unity, community and love that was shown throughout the country. It was humbling to just be a part of it, and we’re extremely proud to have such amazing customers that were happy to part with their funds to support four charities. To think that – together with you customers – we raised $124,000 for Victim Support, the Salvation Army, Canterbury SPCA, & St John is an amazing achievement – definitely our proudest moment as a business to date.
That was deep. Other highlights were the World Cup, and again being part of a collective community spirit cheering on the All Blacks. Being on the Official World Cup path was great, and getting involved with the Piri tees and all the rest was awesome. We didn’t sleep much on account of all the printing we were doing, but it was totally worth it.
As a business, we’ve grown super substantially this year; acquiring more equipment for screen printing, more heavy-drinking staff members, starting mrvintage.com.au, worked with some new business partners, added a whole range of new product lines, and just generally streamlining the business so we don’t make as many mistakes as we used to. We’ll continue doing this next year, where the journey will continue to bigger and better things – and we’re stoked to have an awesome group of customers that help us shape our business by telling us handy things like how big boobs don’t always work with the crew necks so we need to add more vees and scoops. That stuff’s helpful, and we always like talking about boobs as well, so it’s win-win.
So yeah – thanks heaps and look after yourself over Christmas and New Years. We’ll see you in January where we’ll be undertaking a heavy detoxification of the system.
Cheers, the team at Mr Vintage.
Written by Fran on April 16th, 2010.
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Last night I attended a friend of a friend's birthday party out West. Now I don't know how they do it out West...but apparently male strippers are considered totally legit as presents.
Upon arrival, the birthday girl had had more than her fair share of vodka cruisers, and really, thank god because nothing would of prepared her for what was coming next. She was instructed to sit on a seat while we formed a semi circle around her and was told that we were going to start a drinking game...but instead was presented with Raven, a 5'8 "stud muffin" with an awe inspiring goatie and Jersey shore abs.
Raven wasn't what I imagined male stripper to look like (apart from the firefighter getup), but hey, maybe he's just really good at stripping? Well let me tell you now, the answer to that is no. Like all good strippers, he started with a classic, the Day Bow Bow song by yello.
Flinging his axe around, we expected some fireman jokes about it being "hot in here" and "being on fire", but no, our mysterious man instead started grinding on everything in sight and it was about now that I realised he was more of an exhibitionist than a stripper. 55 seconds later he was down to just a man thong. Yum.
He made his way over to his briefcase (An essential for all firemen) and I wondered, "What's in the briefcase? A extinguisher? A hose?" No. A silk wrap around. Because, as we all know, nothing gets girls going more than bare man flesh in silk.
Seductively replacing his thong with his wrap around, he preceded to then make his way around the room showing girls his bits and flinging it in their face. A dream come true for all.
Once he had successfully disturbed everyone in the room, he thanked us and awkwardly started collecting his various bits of clothing from the floor...most of us sat there trying to come to terms by what we had just encountered.
But the worst was yet to come... After he had left in his strip-mobile I noticed he had left a little something other than his dignity behind...his white man thong...and upon closer inspection...a delightful little skiddy in the thong...mmmm, it's now a treasured souvenir belonging to the birthday girl.
There is a moral to this story...a man with only hair on his head and chin never makes for a good birthday present. Ever. You've been warned.
Written by Jay on March 25th, 2010.
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There are a few rumors circulating today concerning the official song for the 2011 Rugby World Cup. http://bit.ly/93sMA5 Please God, I hope it’s not true.
I’m not the biggest rugby fan in the world anymore, these days my involvement barely extends to processing the score of the latest Blues game rather than looking out for it. I’ll watch the All Blacks, but I can’t really remember the last time I enjoyed an All Blacks game. The game’s digressed; it’s not entertaining, going to games is even worse – the atmosphere is like shagging a dead horse. Lifeless
.
smug bastards.
But when it comes to a World Cup, I’ll certainly tune in. It’s the whole feeling about it; opening ceremonies, sudden death, group stages, newspaper schedule pull-outs, and of course, the theme music for the event.
One aspect of music that’s really cool is the way it attaches itself to memories. One time I went on a road trip to Wellington and only took a few CD’s, now every time I hear Jakob, Goldenhorse, or Grandaddy, I’m instantly taken back to the images of driving round Wellington. It’s neat. And now I hear that the Feelers are doing a cover of British pop band Jesus Jones' song 'Right Here, Right Now' for the 2011 Rugby World Cup.
Yes, I do have something against the feelers. But that’s because they are genuinely shit, once I was eating at this restaurant and the Feelers started playing; I damn near threw up my Greek Moussaka! This song will be drummed in to my head if I follow this World Cup with any real conviction, etched in to my heart. It will be like James Reid getting inside my head and whaling his grating voice until I go crazy, and the worst part is that he’s probably being paid pretty handsomely to do it.
I've gradually accepted that the Feelers have somehow wormed their way in to becoming one of New Zealand Music’s favorite sons, but to such a degree? Last year they were awarded the honor of having NZ’s highest selling album – it was their greatest hits. You’re having a laugh. What sort of country do we live in when a band like the Feelers reign supreme?
General opinion of most people I know, and certainly most people on twitter, is that they’re tits. It all begs the question really, is watching the 2011 Rugby World Cup really going to be worth it? I think not. But perhaps my ramblings are in fact misguided, it seems NZ love the Feelers. Am I just being unpatriotic? Maybe I should just stay quiet and agree to disagree.
I’ve just now noticed that it’s been confirmed. http://bit.ly/9Vb42o Read it and weep boys.
Written by Jay on February 19th, 2010.
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On Saturday I went to Waiheke Island for the day. Waiheke’s a wonderful place when the sun is shining; the air crisp, the birds in-tune, the derelicts placid, the water cool and the fruit sweet.
I was understandably delighted to be spending the day there. As I hopped off the ferry, I had enough time to have a quick disagreement with my special lady friend – good enough that the walk to Onetangi was completely silent and really fast. We made great time, which I love.
Whilst there, we obviously required a delicious meal to satisfy the growing hunger. Fish n Chips made sense. So too did the Onetangi Fish n Chips shop. Much like the feeling you get waking up after a big night on the New Zealand Lager, I immediately regretted my decision.
The prices listed on their menu were a dead giveaway. So too was the sign that read, “Expect to wait a while”. I chuckled and thought (well, hoped really), what great branding – these folk seem really light hearted and funny. Minutes later while still waiting I started to think they weren’t just following the ‘under-promise, over deliver’ management tag line my uni lecturer Mr Barlow had drilled in to me in 1st year. They really were that shit.
One of the chefs then noticed us waiting patiently and called to the waitress to pop inside and serve us. Approaching in a flurry of hand drying, the tubby employee approached and looked at us expectantly, without saying a single word. As we ordered, her expression barely changed, her eye contact was non-existent and I watched as she scratched her crotch for an extended period of time. As a reflex I diverted my eyes elsewhere where I stumbled across more of their tasteful branding – a sign that read, “be nice or leave”. This time I let out a cheeky little lol.
Upon receiving our food, we were astonished to find that our ‘scoop’ of chips was closer to a child’s handful, the spicy calamari consisted of two tubes, and the hot-dog on a stick was actually on a stick and not a tooth-pick.
Next time you go to Waiheke, take a picnic, unless you want to be served fish and chips by Lucifer. If you want real Fish n Chips go to ‘Bonzo Burgers Bar’ on Mt Eden Rd. Bonzo is a great guy.
 Mr Bonzo will give you a generous scoop of chips that for damn-tooting.
Written by Jay on January 27th, 2010.
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There’s been a huge furore over those photos published of Corporal Willie Apiata, VC, in Afghanistan. I just want to say one thing. He looks so freaking awesome, even my dear old Mum said, “He looks really tough and cool”.
Joe is considering enlisting after seeing the picture, on the flip side, I feel like way less of a man having seen that picture. It’s a similar feeling I get after watching Man vs. Wild. Bear Grylls is the man, and a far better man than I.
I also see that Millie Holmes/Elder has been arrested again.
That's a piece of poo with decorations on it Millie. from a distance it may look like chocolate or something good and nice, but I assure you it's not. it adds a little bit more to society than you do.
Written by Jay on November 17th, 2009.
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The All Whites are my heroes.
Pretty chuffed about the Football result over the weekend. What a performance – and its pretty sweet to see some of the rugby boof-heads finally realising that the All Blacks are not the team they used to be. Long gone are the days when the All Blacks are an exciting and dominant force in World Rugby. Mike/Mark Delaney played the other day. Yeah. Exactly. But yeah, back to the Football. What an occasion, from what I’ve heard, the TV coverage did the crowd little justice – and I was blown away by what I saw on the TV coverage – I think it’ll be one of the deepest regrets of my life that I didn’t go down to Wellington for that one. Thanks Hayden for having your boxing on the same night as the All Whites crucial World Cup Qualifying fixture, you’re a real champ like that.
What's this? Fans standing up and supporting? Wouldn't see that at a rugby game.
Written by Jay on August 14th, 2009.
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I asked Andy what I should blog about today, and he said I should just blog about what I know, rugby. He was taking the piss, as no one else in the office likes rugby at all. But I thought I might as well.
I seen all this kafuffle lately with some fight at a schoolboy rugby game between Kelston and Auckland Grammar School. They are making a bigger deal out of it than they need to really, fights happen, and brawls happen in rugby. No big deal, dry your eyes Murray Deaker. I might call him actually and say, “Muwwy, two things; you’re a dick mate, go back to your Team NZ BlackHeart campaign”. Probably won’t though. I’m a man of many intentions and little action. But I did go to Auckland Grammar School, making me a Grammar Old Boy I suppose – and I can assure you that Grammar didn’t start it. It was all Kelston Boys High. lol.
Rugby Brawling. That's fine.
One more thing, I went to dinner the other night with my special lady friend at this Greek restaurant Plato's in Ponsonby. Wouldn’t go there again. It’s a Greek restaurant, Greek themed, Greek menu…. You get the idea. So we get in there, sit down at our table, and then they start blasting the music. Now I’m all for music at a restaurant sure, but they proceeded to play the entire bloody Feelers album. It’s a Greek restaurant; play some Greek music for shits sake. And turn it the hell down so it’s not so obtrusive. Nothing more off-putting than hearing James Reid screaming down your ears while your trying to enjoy a Greek Moussaka! And then their EFTPOS didn’t work. They couldn’t quite figure out why. It’s because their phone line is disconnected – exactly the reason I couldn’t make a booking by phone you shmucks.
Plato's in Ponsonby: Wouldn't go there if I was you. Unless you really like the Feelers and paying in cash only.
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