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 DayumThere would be a few guys in NZ that could make videos like this about the Steak n Cheese.... but I can't help but be impressed by his in-depth review, such is his passion for the Double Cheeseburger. I'll put the song first, and if you want to hear him talk about cheeseburgers for 6:44 after that you can go right ahead. Hopefully you enjoy it as much as he enjoyed his cheeseburger, but probably not.
Real Life Homer SimpsonIn a scene eerily reminiscent of Homer Simpsons all you can eat seafood episode, Thiensville resident Bill Wisth was cut off from his ‘all you can eat’ fish fry experience. They sent him on his way – albeit with another 8 pieces - after he had eaten a dozen pieces, and the man is not happy. He’s now set about picketing outside the chain every Sunday until they make some changes. Power to the people.
underwhelming videoWhen a youtube video gets around a million views, you could reasonably assume the video in question is pretty entertaining. When the video involves a Japanese man ordering a burger with 1050 extra pieces of bacon, you have even more reason to be excited. Not so much though, and I’m not sure if I’m the only one, but this video is pretty terrible – certainly not befitting a Mashable article on it. Allow me to save you some time: man orders burger with 1050 pieces of bacon, man can’t finish it, man goes to bathroom – presumably to be sick - and a few other guys have some of his bacon. Video over.
It's back. and so is your double chin.It was only a matter of time really; the greasy Colonel has announced that the Double Down is coming back to our obese shores! No surprises considering it was such a roaring success. It all takes me back to when we got 22 Double Downs. Joe thought he could do 10, but ended up with an admirable 6 sifting around in his gut. That day I was glad I am a vegetarian.  it doesn't actually look like that. Japanese people do things better than us
Don’t believe me? This is how they serve octopus.
Joe Likes Burgers
The other day I was eating dinner at my flat - I do this from time to time, cash flow pending – when we got on to the subject of food consumption; namely speed and volume. We all rated ourselves, and inevitably compared stories of ‘that guy’ we know that can just eat and eat.
Everyone’s got one of these friends. You know the guy; they shovel their food down faster than everyone else at the table, then sit and wait patiently, eyeing up everyone else’s food at the table; carefully analysing which female is most likely to be defeated by her meal and therefore present an opportunity for this food-loving machine to ‘mop up the scraps’.
I’ve got a few friends that fit in to this category, and one of them is Joey Wharehinga, who I have the good fortune of working alongside on a daily basis. Being able to observe this beast in close proximity and study his eating habits has been quite a wild ride. I’ve always known he had a love of food – you only have to check out his twitter to know that much (@justjoe_) – but today he told me a story that perfectly illustrated his lust for greasy burgers.  Joe. thinking of cheeseburgers. I've seen Joe drive 15 cheeseburgers in to that gut.Somehow, throughout the course of this socialising filled evening, he was able to fit in visits to Wendy’s, the one and only White Lady, AND McDonalds. He reckons these visits spanned about 3 hours, and included 10 burgers (including the sizeable White Lady burgers). I was quite astounded that he achieved this feat, all the while still downing a few brews. So astounded in fact that I just had to share it with all of you. Marvel. Here’s what Joe drove in to his gut on that fateful Saturday night: Wendy’s: 1 x Bacon Cheeseburger – snack. The White Lady: 1 x Cheeseburger – filled a gap. McDonald’s: 1 x Big Mac Combo – standard. 1 x Fillet O Fish – piss. 1 x McChicken – processed treat. no mayo. 1 x Quarter Pounder – excessive meat. 4 x Cheeseburgers – dirty little cocksuckers. Monday: 1 x Day off work in bed sick - soft. p.s. I also used to know this guy at Primary School who could run on gravel with bare feet without losing any of his speed. what a result. I Love Stuff In My Mouth I know how that must sound, but... Every now and then a blog will come along and just completely blow your mind. For me, that blog is ‘Stuff in my mouth’. Hearing the name, you’d probably (and perhaps reasonably) assume that this blog is one that carries rather questionable content. Not so. Over the past year or so this fantastic girl and her fantastic little friend have humoured me with the various little items they’ve found time to photograph in their mouths. The items vary. From 14 Giant Jaffa’s, to 22 pencils, to a Dick Tracy figurine – their witty word play and deadpan expressions have always left me extremely satisfied. I’ve no recollection of how I stumbled across this blog; I can only praise the heavens that such a miraculous gift came in to my life. I suggest you try it.
Onetangi Fish n Chips. Shithouse.On Saturday I went to Waiheke Island for the day. Waiheke’s a wonderful place when the sun is shining; the air crisp, the birds in-tune, the derelicts placid, the water cool and the fruit sweet. I was understandably delighted to be spending the day there. As I hopped off the ferry, I had enough time to have a quick disagreement with my special lady friend – good enough that the walk to Onetangi was completely silent and really fast. We made great time, which I love. Whilst there, we obviously required a delicious meal to satisfy the growing hunger. Fish n Chips made sense. So too did the Onetangi Fish n Chips shop. Much like the feeling you get waking up after a big night on the New Zealand Lager, I immediately regretted my decision. The prices listed on their menu were a dead giveaway. So too was the sign that read, “Expect to wait a while”. I chuckled and thought (well, hoped really), what great branding – these folk seem really light hearted and funny. Minutes later while still waiting I started to think they weren’t just following the ‘under-promise, over deliver’ management tag line my uni lecturer Mr Barlow had drilled in to me in 1st year. They really were that shit. One of the chefs then noticed us waiting patiently and called to the waitress to pop inside and serve us. Approaching in a flurry of hand drying, the tubby employee approached and looked at us expectantly, without saying a single word. As we ordered, her expression barely changed, her eye contact was non-existent and I watched as she scratched her crotch for an extended period of time. As a reflex I diverted my eyes elsewhere where I stumbled across more of their tasteful branding – a sign that read, “be nice or leave”. This time I let out a cheeky little lol. Upon receiving our food, we were astonished to find that our ‘scoop’ of chips was closer to a child’s handful, the spicy calamari consisted of two tubes, and the hot-dog on a stick was actually on a stick and not a tooth-pick. Next time you go to Waiheke, take a picnic, unless you want to be served fish and chips by Lucifer. If you want real Fish n Chips go to ‘Bonzo Burgers Bar’ on Mt Eden Rd. Bonzo is a great guy.  Mr Bonzo will give you a generous scoop of chips that for damn-tooting.The Double Pounder and Pounder TooHayden came in to work today with a great drunken tale. He does this a lot. Youths. Him and his white mates purchased a few bottles of wine and drove them in to their guts. Drunk. Then, as it is done, they visited McDonalds. That’s when Hayden decided he wanted to see one of his friends eat a ‘Pounder’ (comprised of 4 quarter patties w/ cheese in-between each). His tall mate Ollie was up for it, so Hayden obliged and set him on his way. Ollie can’t say no. But that’s another yuck story. He finished with ease, the only evidence being a slight sheen to his face. Meat sweats. So Hayden got him a Double Pounder. 8 patties. 8 slices of cheese. $27 Large. The McDonalds manager was so stoked - he had never seen this feat achieved before - he was taking photos and even arranged for a bin to be positioned beside Ollie so he could put his meaty/winey guts in there.  Glad I'm vegetarian. |